Archive for July, 2012

Olympic Reflections II or How Doing This Blog Made Me Write More Good For Our Company Blog

We’re now into Day 3 of the Hardcore XXX Olympic Games, or Games of the Thirtieth Olympiad… whichever you prefer.

Over the weekend, I realized that my patriotism has its limits, which were finally reached last night with NBC’s 17th consecutive hour of swimming coverage. I will forever cheer our country on to victory, but after you’ve been watching swimming all day, you realize that 1) every swimming race looks exactly the same and 2) eventually you feel like you have chlorine in your eyes. Still, I’ve enjoyed the opening salvo of events very much, and of course would feel remiss if I didn’t relay my thoughts about the games thus far:

– If I played a team sport, I would want Hope Solo to be on that team for the following reasons:

a) She would single handedly win any game, contest, match, event, or conflict that we would ever want to engage in.
b) She has her teammate’s backs through thick and thin.
c) She could, at any time, get into a fight with Brandy Chastain.

– The 400 Individual Medley had a very, “the king is dead, long live the king” feeling between Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte. I’m glad that all the training paid off for Lochte, but I wish he didn’t come across as such an asshole. These days, the only  time I root for the bad guy is when I watch Dexter.

– Jordyn Wieber finished 4th overall in the qualifying rounds for the individual gymnastics all around, but will not be part of the top 24 because the system only allows for 2 competitors from each country. When did the BCS start making the rules for women’s gymnastics, and when will the Chinese be given the death penalty for recruiting violations?

– Indoor volleyball is the ultimate team sport, with each individual playing their role as part of a greater whole. Except on the US women’s team, because Destinee Hooker is single handedly destroying Koreans and Brazilians with extreme prejudice.  She had 19 kills and 21 points against South Korea, and 22 kills and 23 points against Brazil. I’m still not 100% on what a kill is, but I know it involves domination. Destinee Hooker is the most awesome thing to hit Royal Albert Hall since Pink Floyd played there in 1973, and it’s clearly because she went to UT. When the US wins the goal medal, and Destinee Hooker throws her horns up in front of the entire world, I will immediately find the most breakable thing in my apartment, and headbutt it.

– Speaking of volleyball, I enjoyed a trip to the beach courtesy of Ms. May-Treanor and Ms. Walsh-Jennings. The Australian ladies didn’t seem to enjoy it quite as much though. At one point, one of them started waggling her finger at Kerri Walsh-Jennings after she blocked the spike. I believe that was the last point the Australians scored. She’s lucky that Walsh-Jennings didn’t break her finger off and do something decidedly inappropriate with it. Maybe next time the Aussies won’t be so quick to wake the dragon.

– Kim Rhode became the first American to medal in 5 straight Olympics by setting a new record with 99 out of 100 in the skeet competition. To be clear, someone shot 100 clay pigeons into the air, and she blew up 99 of them. Or, to put it another way, she can now walk around saying, “You think you got skills? I feel bad for you son. I blew up 99 pigeons and I just missed one.” If you take that level of bad ass, and add it to the fact that she just medaled in her 5th straight Olympics, that’s like bad ass squared. That makes Kim Rhode awesome both figuratively and mathematically.

– I’m enjoying the late night coverage / bonus coverage, but please stop trying to make me watch equestrian. It’s not going to happen. The only way I’m watching anything involving horses in these Olympics is if they give the riders armor, lances, and swords, and this guy gets involved.

Tangent: Apologies to any equestrian fans that this might offend, especially my cousin Ashley who does compete in equestrian events.

Deeper Tangent: One of my cousins is an equestrian… another was a fencer. Where did I go wrong in the realm of civilized sporting competition? I bet I would have been a bad ass snooker player.

Today I’ll close with something that has absolutely nothing to do with the Olympics. A while back, I used to write for our company blog pretty regularly on best practices for website content. It’s a topic on which I can provide a lot of information, but is not something I’m particularly passionate about. Because of this, my posts started to read like a technical writing exercise on how to watch water dry. I believe that they were occasionally used to lull morphine addicts to sleep in lieu of some form of chemical inducement. At any rate, I recently wrote a new post as mandated by our management under my own free will, and I’m happy to report that the writing style I’ve adapted for Life in B-Flat  has spilled over into my other writing. While this may not mean anything to you, for me this is very exciting, because it means that I’m finally starting to grow again as a writer. If you’re interested, you can check out the link to my company blog post below. However, you should only CLICK ON IT if you’re interested in the subject matter, and not because the person who’s blog post gets the most hits gets a gift card at the end of the month. Seriously. That would be wrong.

Click here for the most awesome post about website content in the history of the world and if you don’t click this then you’re not my friend.

Until next time then, here’s hoping that the XXX Games rock on, and that our countrymen continue to dominate their respective fields. Yes, even in equestrian.

P.S – For a neat blog post, click here

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The Olympics: Opening Reflections

After 4 long years of waiting, it’s finally here. I’m a little bit older, not much wiser, and once again am prepared to scream at my television / computer about sports that, except for these 2 weeks every 4 years, I generally will not even give a passing thought about. Thank God the wait is over… the Summer Olympics are here again.

I’m either proud or ashamed to say that last night, my brother and I made it through all 4.5 hours of the opening ceremonies. Despite the somewhat lengthy process, I actually found the entire thing to be very enjoyable. I will not endeavor to recap the entire ceremony, because if I did then the Olympics would be over by the time I was finished. Instead, here are my thoughts on some of the highlights.

– At the risk of offending the masses, the little kid who sang the opening solo has a bigger pair than I do, and he hasn’t even hit puberty. I cannot imagine the tension involved in singing live in front of literally a billion people. He was flawless, as were all of the children’s choirs in the opening portion of the ceremony.

– I don’t know what Meredith Viera and Matt Lauer thought they could add by commentating during the ceremony, but whatever it was, they failed.

– Kenneth Branagh delivering a Shakespearean soliloquy makes everything better. Kenneth Branagh is like ranch dressing.

– Daniel Craig may have elevated himself to the most bad ass of all the Bonds, as he is the only one that I know of to have actually met Queen Elizabeth II on screen. Plus they showed a teaser trailer for Skyfall during the commercials, and it looks awesome.

Tangent: In November, Skyfall comes out. In December, The Hobbit comes out. Merry Christmas Andy.

– The best part of the ceremony was the London Symphony Orchestra, Chariots of Fire, and Rowan Atkinson. If you didn’t see it, stop reading this and watch it now. Seriously. It’s awesome. On a related note, thank you Danny Boyle for not making this thing devoid of humor. The Chinese Olympic Committee could have learned a lot from you.

– The music selections for the 60’s to 90’s portion of the show were very good. However, there should have been a lot more Pink Floyd. In fact, they should have played Pink Floyd the entire ceremony. In all honesty, they should still be playing Pink Floyd. Why am I not listening to Pink Floyd right now? Screw you NBC.

– Kudos to the British for keeping the Parade of Nations moving at a quick pace. I know that it moved at a quick pace because Bob Costas complained at least 20 times that they were being rushed and didn’t have enough time to commentate. My heart damn near broke for him. However, no matter how fast the athletes move, it takes a while to get through 200 countries. That’s why my brother and I invented a Price is Right style game where we would alternate predicting how many athletes made up a country’s delegation, and then the other would take the over or under on that number. We didn’t keep score, but I won.

– After the United States, I will be giving my full throated support to the contingent of Independent Olympic Athletes. Those guys were awesome. I’ll also be cheering for the American Samoans, because they kind of scare me.

– For the final run of the Olympic torch, they had 7 young athletes run around the track while passing the torch between them. I was really hoping one of them would grab the torch and breakaway from the pack. The lack of killer instinct was disappointing.

– Paul McCartney closed out the show with Hey Jude, and I think he might have been either nervous or overcome with emotion. Considering that Paul McCartney has given thousands upon thousands of performances in his career, you know it’s a hardcore event when he’s getting choked up.

And so, the Games of the 30th Olympiad are officially open. So far today I’ve watched preliminary beach volleyball matches and watched the US Women’s Soccer Team crush Colombia 3-0. The US Women’s Team is incredible. The fluidity and grace they show moving the ball down field as a collective unit is amazing, and I look forward to seeing them stand tall on a podium in the very near future. For now though, the NBCSN Simulcast has decided to show some Equestrian action. I’m having a little trouble getting into it, but never fear. This is the Olympics, and I too shall overcome.

In closing, because these are the games of the 30th Olympiad, Time Warner has decided to dub this the XXX Olympic Games on the display. I was already expecting greatness, but now I’m expecting nakedness too. Don’t let me down NBC. And so, as is often the case, I leave you with a haiku in the spirit of competition:

Olympics are here,
US came to dominate.
Here comes the pain, world.

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The Philosophy of Groceries

“Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?” – Author Unknown

Whenever I go grocery shopping, it takes me an abnormally long time. No, it’s not because I’m buying so much food that I need multiple carts, although anyone who immediately jumped to that conclusion is a jackass. For whatever reason, I’m often struck with deep philosophical thoughts while grocery shopping. I really can’t explain why. Maybe it’s because the sheer variety of food at the grocery store puts my brain into introspective overdrive. Maybe it’s because food, as one of the essentials of life, causes our brains to return to a more primal mode… which would explain the actions of the lady who tried to take the last remaining premade pie crust out of my cart on the day before last Thanksgiving.Or maybe I’m just a strange guy who thinks too much about cereal… who knows. The point is, for me a trip to the grocery store is a introspective cleansing experience, and so, I of course feel obligated to share a few of my thoughts that resulted from last night’s trip.

1) When I was but a wee lad, my mother had a rule that stipulated we could select any cereal, so long as sugar was not the first or second ingredient on the box. This is a rule that I still apply to my cereal selection today, but over the years I’ve noticed that the selection of non sugar based cereals seems to be getting smaller and smaller. Why is it that there are 18 different variations on Pebbles but no variations on Crispix, which is my current weapon of choice. Sure, I can add bananas or raspberries to my Crispix to create a delightfully fruity breakfast experience, but why am I forced to work with a base ingredient that has not changed since 1983? Did the good people at Kellogg’s come up with the recipe for Crispix and exclaim,”Heavens to Betsy! We’ve created the perfect cereal!” Don’t get me wrong, I love Crispix, but a man needs some variety in his life. It is possible to add variation to a healthy cereal without sinking the Titanic. Life has it’s Cinnamon… Cheerios has it’s Honey Nut. Maybe if Crispix were to branch out just a little, I could one day pour something new into my bowl and exclaim, “Damn, that is one tasty additive.”

2) When it’s in season, the grocery store I consider my own personal Walden Pond always has an excellent selection of watermelon. As a single bachelor living alone, I’m always hesitant to buy an entire watermelon, because a man who tries to eat an entire watermelon himself before it goes bad is just asking for fruit flies or frequent trips to the restroom. However, one thing I’ve never understood is why a full size watermelon costs $6, while a container of pre-cut watermelon chunks costs $10. There is no magic to the watermelon in those containers. As a watermelon connoisseur, I guarantee that it’s the same stuff that comes from the uncut variety. Furthermore, the containers might contain half the fruit of a full size watermelon, and that’s being extremely generous. Therefore, to get the same amount of watermelon in the cut variety, I would have to pay $20 instead of the $6 for the do it yourself model. What exactly am I paying the extra $14 for? Did the grocery store staff have to undergo special watermelon cutting classes that must not be subsidized by the consumer? Were they sent to Japan to study under Hamato Yoshi, so that they might learn the way of the watermelon and the blade? Why does my grocery store want to punish me for living alone? I feel like I should start a watermelon sharing program, so that I can enjoy watermelon without facing financial ruin, and without having half of it go to waste. That or I guess I can just buy raspberries instead. I do love a good raspberry.

3) So help me God, I love the Kraft Parmesan Cheese. Whenever I make spaghetti, which is pretty often, I always finish it off with a liberal application of cheese. Anyone who has had my spaghetti has never complained, so I will forever trust the good people of Kraft. However, as much as I love the stuff in the green can, I really wish they would lie to me a bit more. At my grocery store, the Kraft Parmesan is not even remotely close to the refrigerated section. It’s stacked on a shelf, right on top of the Velveeta.

Tangent: There is a lot I could say about Velveeta, but I won’t today. We’ll leave that for another story. One word teaser: chili.

I understand that the Kraft Parmesan doesn’t have to be refrigerated before opening it, but couldn’t we at least pretend? All the other cheese is refrigerated… why can’t this be refrigerated too? There’s plenty of room, and even if there isn’t, let’s get rid of some of the American singles slices. The point is, I don’t want to know about the preservatives in the Kraft Parmesan that remove the necessity for refrigeration. Ever since the state of Texas declared me to be an adult, it’s been a never ending education process of why you shouldn’t eat this, or that. From what I can gather, at this point no one should ever eat anything ever, except celery. No matter what diet / food plan / guru you consult with, celery seems to be on everyone’s nice list. I guarantee you that Kraft Parmesan is not on the nice list, but I don’t care. I’ve stopped eating baked goods, except when Kristen bakes brownies laced with the 4 c’s (caramel, coconut, crack cocaine) and brings them into the office. I’ve stopped buying pop tarts, and instead buy organic granola bars that suck. I’ve even switched from 2% milk to 1% milk, and just pretend that what I’m drinking actually tastes like milk instead of murky water. However, I will not give up my Kraft Parmesan cheese when I make spaghetti. If I die tomorrow, I want to be buried with my wooden spoon in one hand, my Kraft Parmesan in the other, and a Mario Brothers style mustache drawn on my face. All I ask is that we just pretend Kraft Parmesan has to be refrigerated, so that I can live under the illusion that the magic in the green can will not lead me to an untimely demise.

So, as you can see, grocery shopping takes me a long time. But really, that’s ok. I think we spend too much time in this day and age rushing from one place to another, without taking the time to stop and smell the hot french bread that you can take home for 99 cents a loaf, or 1/10 of the price of a container of sliced watermelon. For me, grocery shopping is my happy, peaceful zen place. Here’s hoping that all of you have your own happy place , and that you can spend as much time as possible there.

P.S. – One day I’ll tell you all a story about pudding. Don’t worry, it has a happy ending.

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Enough is Enough

I’m not going to apologize for my lack of recent posts. If Jesus had wanted me to post before now, I would have been blessed with divine inspiration or something.

A week ago, for reasons that none of us will ever understand, James Holmes entered a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises with enough guns to invade a 3rd world country, and proceeded to open fire on the theater patrons. Among the dead are:

– Jessica Ghawi, a young, aspiring sportswriter (who used the exact same theme that I do for her WordPress blog) . Jessica narrowly escaped a similar attack in Toronto just 4 weeks ago.

– Jonathan Blunk, a sericeman who had served 3 tours of duty, and who had aspirations of re-enlisting to become a Navy SEAL. He died while shielding his girlfriend from the bullets, a fate also shared by Matt McQuinn and Alex Teves.

– Veronica Moser-Sullivan, a 6 year old child who’s mother is currently in critical condition after being shot in the throat, and is unaware of her daugher’s fate.

Every victim has their own story. Those stories will likely be told for years to come. Scholarships will be established, memorials will be created, and vigils will be held. We will remember their names, and mourn the sudden end of journeys that will now forever remain incomplete. I myself will not cheapen the memories of the fallen by trying to eulogize people whom I only know from news stories. Instead, I will sit here in anger over what happened, and ask all the righteous questions I can think of on their behalf.

Why was a 6 year old kid at a PG-13 movie at a midnight showing? How did someone manage to legally acquire an arsenal of weapons and enough ammunition to re-enact the final scene from Butch Cassady and the Sundance Kid without someone batting an eyelash? Why did this happen 13 miles from Columbine High School? Is Aurora, Colorado the nexus of evil on Earth? On what planet does the arguement, “if more people in the audience had concealed handguns, maybe this wouldn’t have happened” make sense? Why do we feel the need to keep killing each other, and why do the laws in this country make it so easy to do it? Why does this keep happening?

There are, of course, no easy answers to these questions. Even if there were answers, it wouldn’t change what happened. It won’t bring back a woman who just wanted to write about hockey, or a man who survived multiple tours in the Persian Gulf only to be gunned down at a theater in his own homeland, or a little girl who just wanted to learn how to swim.

I won’t sit here and argue that guns should not be controlled, but rather eliminated from our society. I may feel that way, but frankly I don’t want to use my blog as a platform for political debate. What I will say is that something needs to change, because what we’re doing now is not working. I’m tired of shuddering every time I see the “Special Report” slide pop up on my television. I’m tired of cryptic comments on Facebook with links that make me dread to click on them. And I’m tired of trying to remain positive in a world filled with so much negativity. Men like George Zimmerman and James Holmes were not born evil, but somehow got the will and the instruments to do evil things.

When will enough be enough? And how many more people have to die before we can all stand together to say stop?

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Six Degrees of Random Movie Thoughts

1) Between 2008 and 2012, Shia LaBeouf did a Wall Street sequel, 2 sequels to Transformers, and Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Not only did this make him very rich, he also proved that you do not, in fact, have to hold political office to disappoint the entire country over a 4 year period.

2) Tomorrow, Harrison Ford will turn 70 years old. According to IMDB, Indiana Jones 5 has been announced with an unknown release date. While I love any Indiana Jones movie that was not made in this millennium, I do not want to see a 70 year old man doing stunts. If I did, I would still be watching Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan. What it boils down to is that the tyrannical grasp that George Lucas and Steven Spielberg have on the franchise must be ended. The time has come for humanity to rebel against this unholy movie empire and… wait a minute…. when did Lucas & Spielberg become the Emperor and Darth Vader? Now that’s irony.

3) If Gary Oldman had access to the weapons he had in The Fifth Element, Air Force One would have been about 10 minutes long with a very different ending. Glenn Close would never have even gotten any screen time as the Vice President, and as a result the idea for the television show Commander In Chief never would have been born. To summarize, the world would have been a better place if Gary Oldman had gone all Fhloston Paradise on that airplane.

4) Some people like to debate who is more hardcore — Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer or Bruce Willis as John McClane. Those people are debating just for the sake of debate, because John McClane would whip Jack Bauer’s ass like it owed him money. Let me put it this way — If Bruce Willis had ridden with Billy the Kid, Billy would have lived to be about 97 years old and retired on a ranch somewhere in the San Fernando Valley. If Bruce Willis had been the 3rd musketeer, then the other 2 musketeers wouldn’t have had jack to do during that movie, because Bruce Willis would have killed every mofo in France… with a Three Musketeers bar. And if Bruce Willis ever went up against Kiefer Sutherland head to head, 24 would be the number of seconds and not hours that day would have lasted. Yippie kai kay, Mr. Sutherland.

5) What would have happened if Tom Cruise really had been unable to handle the truth in A Few Good Men? Would he have broken down crying right there in court? Jack Nicholson does not strike me as someone who gives hugs just because someone is sad. Also, if Helen Hunt had been in A Few Good Men instead of As Good As It Gets, would he still have ordered the Code Red? Did that marine have to die? Or Scatman Crothers? What about the good people of Gotham? How many innocent people have suffered over the years because no one made Jack Nicholson want to be a better man until 1997?

6) In 1978, Kevin Bacon assured a panicked mob that all was well. While he was completely wrong, given the situation you have to admire his positive attitude. I wonder if he’d done that more often, would things have gone better for him throughout his career? Would Mrs. Vorhees still have stabbed him through the mattress with that arrow? Would he still have blown out his knee playing college basketball? Would Meryl Streep have cheerfully guided him down the river instead of fighting him every inch of the way? And, would have the Apollo 13 mission gone off without a hitch? Maybe it’s me, but I think if the words, “Houston, all is well,” had been broadcast from the moon, we all would have been just a little happier leaving the movie theater.

NOTE: Today’s post meets the qualifications of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Submitted for your approval:

Shia Lebeouf was in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull with Harrison Ford
Harrison Ford was in Air Force One with Gary Oldman
Gary Oldman was in The Fifth Element with Bruce Willis
Bruce Willis was in I’m Still Here with Jack Nicholson
Jack Nicholson was in A Few Good Men with Kevin Bacon

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Random Thoughts and Questions for Musicians

DISCLAMER: Some of the songs referenced in today’s post are gangsta rap songs. As is such, they tend to explore the realm of vocabulary that some might find offensive. Therefore, if you click on a link and don’t like what you hear, close the browser.

1) In 1993, Snoop Dogg asked us, “Who Am I? (What’s My Name)?” In 1999, Eminem answered with, “My Name Is.” In 2010, Rhianna took things full circle by once again asking, “What’s My Name?” Perhaps the question we should all be asking is, “Why isn’t anyone testing the hip hop community for early onset dementia?”

2) If Lil Jon and the East Side Boyz were to get low with Afroman while he got high, wouldn’t they all just be walking around normally?

3) If Tupac really did have all eyes on him, then why doesn’t anyone know who shot him?

4) Metallica can stop asking for whom the bell tolls. Dr. Dre has kept their heads ringing for a long time now. But seriously, how does he always know that I’m bobbing my head? And how can he see me? Why does Dr. Dre have my apartment wired for surveillance? That’s really creepy.

5) Sometimes I wonder if Tha Crossroads that Bone Thugs N Harmony will see us at is the same crossroads where Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil. If so, those crossroads must be the nexus of all things musical in the universe. I bet John Williams has a secret underground lair there where he fights evil with awesome orchestral scores.

6) If there was no limit to the amount of recording tape that a reel could hold, would Rapper’s Delight ever had ended? Considering that song fades out at the end, I wonder how long The Sugar Hill Gang kept going. I wonder if anyone actually told them that the tape had ended. In my head, they eventually got to the point where they were rapping about rapping in the studio at that moment in time. That’s how The Sugar Hill Gang wrote Inception way back in 1979. Christopher Nolan totally ripped them off.

7) It’s becoming quite apparent that none of us are every going to get another chance to do the hump. If I had then what I know now, I wouldn’t have squandered the opportunity. Seriously though, over the years we’ve had multiple opportunities to jump (Van Halen, Kris Kross), shout (The Isley Brothers, Tears for Fears) and even spin (Dead or Alive, The Theme Song from Tale Spin). Statistically speaking, by now we should have at least had one more shot at doing the hump.

8) When I was young, I used to think that the Billie Jean that Michael Jackson was referring to was Billie Jean King. That’s how I knew he was telling the truth when he said that she wasn’t his lover. Had that song been released by Janet Jackson instead, I would have been considerably more skeptical.

9) If Alien Ant Farm had been so concerned with how Annie was doing when Michael Jackson first posed the question, then maybe Annie wouldn’t have grown up to become Darth Vader. As it stands, millions died and the Jedi were almost hunted to extinction all because Alien Ant Farm waited almost 15 years to follow up.

10) If Green Day, Lenny Kravitz, James Brown, Don McLean, and David Bowie all got together and sang a song, it would be called “Living in American Pie With A Young, Idiot Woman.” It would be used by political candidates right before they delivered a stump speech, played during the 7th inning stretch of all major league baseball games not played in Toronto, and butchered by contestants on both American Idol AND The Voice. It would also be butchered on The X Factor, but far, far fewer people would realize it. Congress would take steps to pass legislation to make it our new national anthem, which would then defeated handily in a vote on the Senate floor after people remembered that David Bowie is, in fact, British. The rights to the song would ultimately be purchased by Bob Iger, who would lock it in the Disney Vault next to Song of the South and Julie Andrews, and vow not to release it until Justin Bieber was deported back to Canada and sent to the Yukon with only a bottle of hairspray and a spork.

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I (Don’t) Got Rhythm

At this very moment, I’ve determined that there are 3 things that throw off my rhythm more than anything else. They are, in no particular order:

1) Sales guys talking loudly behind me while I’m trying to write.
2) Trying to play guitar in Rock Band/Guitar Hero while Anton is playing the drums.
3) Nationally recognized holidays that occur in the middle of the week.

Don’t get me wrong, I have absolutely no problem with the 4th of July. I hold those truths to be self evident as much as the next person, I pursue life, liberty, and happiness with extreme vigor, and I will high five every minuteman I ever meet. I also don’t have any problem with days off from work/school, although I do wish that the kids in my neighborhood hadn’t displayed their patriotism until 3:00 in the morning.

Tangent: 2 things I’ve never understood about the 4th of July: 1) Why do we celebrate by blowing up millions of dollars worth of material made in China and 2) Why do we listen to an epic masterwork created by a slightly insane Russian composer? While I may never figure that out, I hope to God we never stop, because fireworks and the 1812 Overture kick ass.

I think that celebrating the 4th of July is not only a right, but the responsibility of every red blooded American that has ever spangled a starry banner across the fruited plains. I just wish there was some loophole in the Gregorian calendar that prevented it from ever occuring on a Wednesday. Usually by this point in the week I’m well into my groove. My correspondence is flowing, my clients are listening, or at least pretending to listen to my consultation, and I’ve made at least 1 programmer or designer cry. This week though, I feel like someone got to Wednesday hit the reset button, got the grey screen of death, pulled the cartridge out, blew in it, put it back in the Nintendo, and discovered that all of their save game data had gone to Nintendo Heaven. Suffice it to say, it feels like Monday and I’ve got absolutely no rhythm at all.

For me, having a good rhythm is something that extends well past music. I don’t ever aim to become mired in routine, doing the exact same thing day in and day out without any hope of escape. If that was my goal, I would have become an accountant.

Tangent: Math is lame except on this show.

I do think it’s important to establish a rhythm to one’s life. Unfortunately, there is no universal rhythm that’s perfect for everyone. For some, the right rhythm might be the Danza Final from Estancia. Those people move with speed, ferocity, and will probably stab you if you get in the way. Others might pose the question, ‘how blue can you get,” as they move a bit slower, but deliberately and with many, many awesome solos. I don’t know if this is a good metaphor or not, but this particular version of How Blue Can You Get managed to redeem Blues Brothers 2000 in only 5 minutes and 31 seconds, so you should probably listen to it.

Whether it’s fast or slow, everyone should strive to find their rhythm. Without it, we are merely a wildly bouncing ball in the pinball machine of life. Hopefully by tomorrow I’ll have re-established my own rhythm. Until then, I’ll leave you with this haiku:

It feels like Monday
But tomorrow is Friday
That part does kick ass.

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